‘I think I should tell him this’ Mathruka said suddenly, without opening her eyes.
‘No.’ replied Tanya, understanding the head and tail of it instantaneously.
‘No, Tanya, you do not understand this, I know he is in love, I’m too sure of it!’
‘Oh, I didn’t know there were confirmatory tests, what are they anyway?’
‘I saw his eyes shining…they were too brilliant that I was blinded that very instant.’
‘Cut the crap. You know that I love him. Do you happen to see that supernatural light in my eyes too?’
‘You should be asking him that.’
‘Sure you can say that. Admit it, you want to square it off, act great, don’t you?’
Mathruka laughed a careless laughter. ‘Seriously, you overrate me.’
‘No. You are making his life a living hell already. But the madman that he is, he thinks it is a blessing. What you say now will shatter him into pieces, and mind you, a person in love is made of glass, no mending possible, ever.’
‘Like I care. I repeat it, I know for sure that he is crazily in love with me, and would love irrespective of whatever I have said before, or will say. But, I am not phony enough, what do you say?’
‘Explain.’
‘The incident that lead to the moment? Sure. Just that it is nothing much for a person who did not see what it really was. I had asked him for some water. I wasn’t exactly dying, but needed it anyway. I didn’t even ask him that, he looked at me checking out the shops and was off in a moment. He was back in a flash, and that is no exaggeration. Now, you know that I’m not touchy about love. I never believed in stuff which ranted that love gives you power. They are wrong. Love gives enormous power. It makes one extraordinary from a nobody. You cannot go higher up without paying for it, doesn’t make any sense to me. ‘
‘Shut up, you are gasping.’ Tanya said amidst tears.
‘Now, take me to his room.’
‘What? You mean he is in this hospital? What?
‘Don’t worry, he is alive, fractures in legs.'
‘How did you manage to kill yourself Mathruka? What is this insanity all about?’
‘I did say, I saw the light and was blinded.’ (Gentle smile) ‘Now, Tanya, take these moronic stuff off my body, I want to say this once to him – ‘I don’t love you, Vishwas!’
7 Scrutinizing thoughts:
Since when did to be in love require reciprocation? The reward of any emotion, including love is the emotion itself. Blessed are those, who have the capacity to feel. To feel towards at least one person, is something that one could die for.
By reciprocation, I meant acknowledgement. Even negation.
@Anon,
I didn't know there was a reward expected for being in love, in the first place. And, I wasn't dealing with people who misinterpret indifference, they are mere sympathy mongers.
@Bhargavi
I never talked about expectations. Even if there is a reward to be found, it is found in oneself - realization of capacity to love, extent of love, et al.
Never spoke of indifference. Spoke of the indifference towards difference, if there is a word that means opposite of indifference.
@Anon,
Precisely. I got the point. Sympathy mongers, I repeat it.
@Bhargavi,
I wonder why it is that tragedy, or the likelihood of one, makes us want to say or do things we would not have done if life had gone on at an even pace. Is it like the fear of losing everything gives us the courage to face smaller fears?
Otherwise, I liked the story. One of your more imaginative works.
Suchitra
@Suchitra,
No, it was not about tragedy at all. I always believe that mind and body work in tandem. I applied that logic to love, which I believe is no exception to that. I had meant that it takes an exceptional physical trouble to realize an exception mental pleasure. We don't realize so many things when things are normal allegedly, do we? :) We need a jolt at times, just built on those lines.
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